On 2009 - Pissing People Off While Simultaneously Taking Ownership of Your Life

First and foremost, I would like to introduce myself. My name is Ryan. I am a film producer by day and a clairvoyant superhero by night. I give psychic readings and healings on a daily basis. I help people find their own truths and certainly help them reveal their true paths and journey. It is such a blessing to see people on a level that is beyond the surface. To truly see them. Attempting to see in non-judgment. In neutrality. We all have this ability. All I did was decide to look into it, turn it on, and use this tool to benefit my life and the lives I touch. I am no better than anyone. I don't have all the answers. All I really have is my truth and what i see. That sounds extremely threatening huh? :)

2009. The year that made us all grow up. We have been tested to the ultimate limit. We have been knocked down. We have been fearful. We have been forced to see and think differently. We have made excuses that don't work anymore, yet we survived and have definitely changed.

In 2009, I was a lover, a warrior, creator, destroyer, mistress, liar, thinker, feeler, failure, a dreamer, dancer, alcoholic, fool, healer, loner... always oblivious, pissing people off, always questioning, always wanted and needed, always wanting and needing, lacking trust, getting ahead of myself, in like, out of like, late for work, sleeping in too late, danced the nights away, drank jealousy, drank other things, taught people, hit betrayal in the face, questioned what betrayal was, made just enough money to get by, experienced amazing friendships, reattached on a new level with family, experienced and experiencing an amazing relationship, saved many of times when i was falling down, devastated when my best friend moved away, laughed, cried more than I have, fell in love with everyone all over again, created a partnership and company, gained some patience and even lacked patience at times, finally started to understand business, finally understood people won't get it, and finally understood I believed in so many people to get it that won't...and the list goes on.

I can't even describe how appreciative I am for all of it. I am fulfilled.

I can honestly say 2009 has its true place in my personal history. As the new year approaches, I can't seem to figure out how life is working, yet it still is. Taking ownership of your life is a hard thing to do. You start to piss people off. What does that really mean? Try thinking about it for 2010.

What does it mean to survive now? What does it mean to feel? What does it mean to have? What does it mean to love? What does it mean to communicate? see? know?

We are all turning on. We are excited for some reason right? We all know 2010 is a year to get it on and attempt to do it right...what rings true for ourselves?

I am finally ready to follow my dreams in 2010 (still convincing myself as I type), and it's about damn time. There is no room for fear. No room for jealous people. No room for ignorance, only innocence. No room to lack confidence. After the many sessions I've had with people and told them to follow their truth and dreams...I'd be a hypocrite if I didn't start my own right this second...it's only 7:00PM. December 31st.

I'll wait just a few more hours...

You Are Not Wrong

It's interesting how things come about when you rise up from the dead to an unplanned day. I woke up to an invitation to have lunch with two old friends from school; two very gifted psychic women. Days unplanned seem to just flow.

As always, I'm rushing to get places. Showered the night before, so I put on my blue and red plaid button up. Put on shoes with holes in them. Checked my email. Sprinted out the door. Didn't smoke a cigarette. Didn't really want to smell like smoke in front of them out of courtesy I suppose. I arrived and it was a blessing in disguise. It's always a blessing being surrounded by people who understand you and most of all not in judgment of you. They might be 10-25 years older than me, but I'm finding out through time that it really doesn't matter...it's still setting in that I'm not a teenager anymore or a Columbia College student filmmaker.

The reason why the title of this post is called 'You Are Not Wrong' is because a discussion came up during lunch and it really stood out to me the most amongst all the fulfilling conversations we had today.

Ever since clairvoyant training ended, I've been doing reading after reading; healing after healing. Through it all, I couldn't have asked for a better life. Not only have I learned more about how people tick...I've learned about how I tick. I learned about the concept of 'no one is wrong' in training, but it has been constantly on my mind ever since and I've incorporated it in my sessions with people.

What if no one was wrong? I have truly fallen in love with this concept and I am constantly struggling with it at the same time. There are people in my life who I struggle with because I want them to see truth and to understand what that means to those around them...but really my truth is not necessarily their truth. We all live in our own dreams and perceptions. Who's to say who's wrong about anything? It just means that we all need to be ready for the consequences of our actions and take responsibility for them because no one lives in our own minds and bodies. We all have to be ready to communicate with impeccability and not assume anything and that is probably everyone's hardest battle. I know it's definitely mine.

Not everyone is going to understand my perception and I say...that's wonderful! The hardest part is when you love someone so deeply and they aren't getting it or wanting to get it, it's hard not to think they are wrong...and in reality, they aren't wrong. To really stand for this concept of 'not being wrong' takes so much work because we are all so programmed to want everything to go OUR way or totally discard someone else's reality about how they want to live their lives. It's hard because I just want to heal everything and everyone around me and I just can't anymore (except for the fact that one of my professions is being an energy healer and clairvoyant)... though I am so much more happier knowing I am working towards that goal. When I am living in my own dream, there is no reason to be upset and really as cheesy as it may sound, I love the people around me and who have been in my life even more than I ever have before.

People can live their lives the way they want and personally I ain't gonna try to stop them. So I say from my own truth, live life and love it to the fullest... even though you can't pay rent, buy that car you want, have the relationship you want, lost your house during Katrina, and/or stepped in shit today. It's all just energy. Clear it and move on to the next thing. It's time to create!